The Official Ninja Webpage: REAL Ultimate Power!!! is a humorous website created by "Robert Hamburger" about ninjas, whom he constantly describes with superlatives typically used by adolescent boys, such as "totally sweet". The site has become very popular and has generated large amounts of attention including hate mail, as well as a number of parodies. Hamburger describes ninjas through three "facts":

1. Ninjas are mammals.
2. Ninjas fight ALL the time.
3. The purpose of the ninja is to flip out and kill people.

The site contains a variety of dubious information on ninjas, including a timeline of ninjas throughout history ("4.5 billion years ago: Ninjas discover flipping out and thus God gives them dominion over everything totally sweet"), as well as illustrated instructions on how to commit seppuku using a frisbee. It also details, by means of several mock-up CNN and MSNBC news articles, a fictional lawsuit brought against Robert Hamburger by a mother concerned that the website was negatively influencing children.

While Robert Hamburger is certainly a fictional character, the website's true creator is a UCLA student named Robert Alan Hornbacker Jr, as shown by links to RealUltimatePower's original location on his university webspace. Real Ultimate power is currently hosted by A+ hosting in Las Vegas, IP 64.235.39.152.

Much of the humor associated with the Real Ultimate Power website is obscure, drawing on the common youthful obsession with ninjas by elementary and junior high school-age children.

Book

REAL Ultimate Power, The Official Ninja Book (ISBN 080652569X) was published on July 1, 2004. It was published by Citadel, and is 193 pages.

The book's humor is rather darker than that of the RealUltimatePower.net site, with footnotes including pyschological evaluations of Robert Hamburger and interviews with his parents. It paints a somewhat tragic, perhaps autobiographical portrait of an isolated, roughly middle-school-aged young boy seeking refuge in his alternate reality of ninjas verus pirates; "Robert Hamburger" is shown to have neglectful parents and severe but easily handled behavioral issues, with fantasies of kidnapping and defective relationships with almost everyone except the book's editor and his dog Francine.

The product description posted on Amazon.com reads:

Dear Stupid Idiots,

A lot of you have been saying that I don't know anything about REAL ninjas. But that's a bunch of bull crap! You dummies don't know anything. And maybe YOU should get a life. I bet a lot of you have never even seen a girl naked! You idiots believe that ninjas had some "code of honor". Yeah right! If by "code of honor", you mean "code to flip out and go nuts for absolutely no reason at all even if it means that people might think you are totally insane or sweet", then you are right. But if you mean a "code to be nice and speak nicely while sharing and not cutting off heads", then you're the biggest idiot ever!!!!!! So if you have any brains, you will shut up and get a life. So go shut up, you stupid idiot.

No thank you,

Robert Hamburger

See also

• Ninja Burger
• Internet phenomenon
• List of websites

External links

• Real Ultimate Power website
• The Official Real Ultimate Power Parody Directory Webpage